Kamri Mclendon (18) gave birth last May to her daughter Presleigh. The father is her boyfriend of two years, Tristan Mcphail. Mclendon and Mcphail now live together with what Mclendon calls their “greatest blessing” — their newborn baby. The couple is not married.
When the baby was born, Mclendon contacted her local church, The Hickory Grove United Methodist Church, in Sumrall, MS, to arrange for Presleigh's baptism. Although she admitted her church attendance had been sporadic after the arrival of her child, she said her family had attended the church for generations. And she wanted her daughter to be baptized where she had been baptized.
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Initially, the Rev. Dewayne Warren had agreed to baptize little Presleigh even though he was aware of the parents' marital status. Then he changed his mind. He sent Mclendon a letter calling her a sinner and saying she came from a long line of sinners. He wrote,
Dear Kamri,
I am writing to inform you that we will not be able to do the “baby dedication” on Sunday, September 25, 2022. The following reasons are why I have made this decision: I am informed that you and the baby’s father are living together in sin; the baby was conceived before the parents were married. The grandmother is living with a man in sin. You and the father have not been in regular faithful attendance at our church.
From a practical point of view, would it not be a better strategy to accommodate people who are not attending church regularly if regular attendance is your goal? I do not recall reading that Jesus turned people away because they had not previously been worshipful enough.
If I were the CEO of a small business, I would be thrilled that customers were showing interest in what I was selling — even if that interest was initially window shopping. But this man of God was just getting warmed up. Having pushed Kamri to the ground, he kicked her in the stomach.
The ceremony that you want performed [sic] is a Christian ceremony. It is a covenant between the parents and God. You promise to raise your child in the Christian faith with all that entails. That means that you attend church on a regular basis with your child. It means that your life shows that you are living the Christian faith. I do not see that in your life at this time.
How Christian of him.
Then he decided that what Kamri needed, after a good spanking, was a vocabulary lesson.
Also in the United Methodist Church, we don’t do baby dedications. We do infant baptism. You christen ships, we baptize babies.
I bet Kamri is feeling better for that knowledge. But Dewayne was not done. He added some useful information on ritual scheduling.
Also you don’t give the Pastor the date for the ceremony. He gives you the date. This is a very important ceremony with a lot of meaning. You are making a promise to God, and I was saying that you will keep that promise. You have to be right with God in order to make that promise
Then he stuck the landing.
I say all of this in Christian love. I know that it is harsh, but it is the truth. I was trying to wait for the Holy Spirit of God to convict [sic] you on this, but we were running out of time. I cannot in good conscience perform the ceremony at this time.
Sincerely, etc.
This Christian love sounds like a synonym for hate. I attended Anglican schools, and although I am no longer a person of faith, I remember well the many hours of Bible study we did, particularly the Gospels. There is nothing in this Pastor's rant that is in any way reminiscent of the compassion of Jesus.
He is like one of the Pharisees, who loved the rules of religion. But, due to their intolerance and obsession with form, completely lost the plot.
Despite the dominance of conservative evangelicalism in US public life, religion in America is losing adherents. And the majority of Americans now admit they do not attend religious services. Poorly run businesses go kaput. The Hickory Grove United Methodist Church is already morally bankrupt. And if it pursues the path it is on, its cash flow will also dry up.
God willing.
Today I had someone say something to me that was extremely judgemental, my feelings towards this person are not the same. These so called people of God are disgusting, thank you Pitt, you write so well what I’m feeling